She placed him in her lap, petting his hair. She missed when his coat was silky smooth, age had made it coarse and thin. She wondered if he knew what ageing was, if he understood why he couldn’t see as well anymore. She wanted to know if he missed the sound of her voice as his hearing progressively got worse and worse, or if maybe he just thought she had stopped talking to him.
She prayed that he understood how much she loved him and she asked God to let them stay together as long as possible. She hoped beyond anything that there was a God and a heaven because she knew if there were he would go to wait for her there when he passed, just like he waited for her every day when she left the house.
She gave him a kiss on the nose and started to cry. She couldn’t bear the thought of living without him. He was her prince, the one boy who never let her down. He had stolen her heart the minute their eyes met in the most beautiful and pure forms of love. He gave her so much more than she felt she could ever give him back because his love was unconditional and she didn’t even think people were capable of having hearts that ran so deep.
He sat in her lap, feeling at peace as she stroked his back. He wondered if she understood what ageing was. He hoped she didn’t think he was ignoring her, he just couldn’t see her or hear her or run after her the way he had once been able to. He missed the sound of her voice, it had always soothed him. He wished he didn’t have to strain for it, but understood that he was just fulfilling his life. Life was full of gains and losses. He wanted to tell her how much he loved her, how he didn’t want to leave her, but he recognized that she wasn’t capable of understanding him. He kissed her hand, using actions he knew she could decipher to show her what he couldn’t say.
He felt her tears falling upon his hair. He hated when she cried because she was so amazing in his eyes. From the moment he had seen her, at the start of his life, he could see how pure her soul was. As the years went by he was forced to watch her get hurt, see her sparkle fade through the torments of life. It had been his job and his honor to bring it back every time he could. Making her laugh and smile were the greatest joys of his, the only way he could pay her back for the unconditional love she gave him.
She hugged him tight and he breathed in her aura. He loved when she cuddled him close. He felt that his time was getting short, but he promised himself to hold on as long as he could for her. He wasn’t ready to let her go, he didn’t want to leave her without someone to look after her. He prayed that she would understand that he would have stayed with her forever if it was his choice.
He closed his eyes and started to drift to sleep. He got tired very often, but when he dreamt he was able to go back to days when he could run and jump and play and keep her laughing for hours.
She felt him falling asleep in her arms. He was her old, little baby and she loved him so much. She wanted to capture the moment forever in time, to carry with her after he was gone.
Her phone rang and the moment was lost as he woke up with a start. She had errands to run and the outside world to deal with. She put him down and gathered her things and rushed out the door, missing her chance to say goodbye.
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